Don’t Stop The Seeking
Step 11 starts with the word “sought”, which is the past tense of “seek”. Since I “sought through prayer and meditation” a relationship with a Higher Power in the previous 10 steps, it is my understanding that I must continue searching throughout my life. My searching and my seeking doesn’t stop at step 11, it has to continue one day at a time so I can keep this precious gift of sobriety.
Connection with Higher Power
I remember early in recovery I had fought the idea of dependence on a Higher Power. I thought I was self-sufficient and I could do anything if I worked hard enough at it. I wasn’t powerless or had an unmanageable life. I surely didn’t need something greater than myself to stay sober even though using almost killed me. I fought all the things we learn in the program until I hit a spiritual bottom and needed to get honest with myself. I had to face the truth. I had to admit that I desperately needed help. Asking for help is something that just doesn’t come naturally to me so I knew I was in a really bad place. I did find help and got busy working the steps of the program. While I worked the steps, I found a Higher Power and began my spiritual journey.
The War On Our Attention
“Until you make your unconscious conscious, it will direct you and you will call it fate" ~Carl Jung
Does this sound familiar to you: you take a moment and open your social media app of choice or your email with the intention of just checking it really quickly. You start to look at one post or email. Then you click a link you see that is interesting, which brings you to a video. You watch the video, which then points you to another video. You watch the second video and click another link. The next thing you know, 3 hours have passed and you’ve got nothing done nor can you remember what you initially set out to do before you got caught in the distraction loop.